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he makes me sit a little straighter 

back stiffened less relaxed

i keep a third eye

on this beautiful male specimen

who struts that strut

sometimes, when i least expect it

he catches my wondering gaze 

and slowly lingeringly 

i savor his sweet foreign eye candy 

the taste lingers for an eternity

ah, the smile... 

(i made him uncomfortable

no doubt from my vacant minded cow stare)

he politely smiles nonetheless, 

with a smile that does not require a mouth 

(although most people who have mouths 

use them to smile... grin... or smirk?

to curve upwards at the edge of both lips...

in order to export positive internal emotions!

but his smile does not require a mouth

his smile can be considered a mouthless masterpiece

it's a smile that radiates from the corner 

of the eyes and the tilts of the brows

he smiles at me from the window of his soul

and for an instant i lack auditory capabilities  

and my bellybutton tickles and i fully understand 

what it must be like to live inside of a battery...

and then the visual exchange is over

when finally i notice the warm trickling 

trail of droll sliding freely down my chin

desperately i wipe my face with my sleeve

but it's too late he's noticed 

and wont beam at me anymore

i grasp for a second connection 

anything!

now!

nervously i... i... i fumble and start talking a thousandwordsperminute so that i don't seem dull but all the while i'm stut.tering sound.ing b b b bounces off my tongue and out my m m mouth wwwwwords are sometimes accidentally placed not -i mean words i use them incorrectly in the order that is wrongly -i mean which not right sounds -i mean of course i can't understood be -i mean i have difficulty forming coherent sentences and therefore sound like an over-caffinated yoda 

and all this blundering makes me seem like a self-absorbed illiterate drug abusing bitch with a speech impediment and a hint of mental retardation

ugh! 

i'm such a creep.

-c.sharp

...and that's how I became a man.